Three Things Thursday No. 8: Making Life Work
Hello there!
Well! After I wrote you last week and told you how burned out I was, I took a long weekend and just was as lazy as I could be. I watched hours of television, played hours of Angry Birds Dream Blast, ate substantial quantities of chocolate and read a fantastic memoir cover to cover. It was GREAT, and now I feel SO much better. How about you? Are you a workaholic? Do you take regular time off?
Thing 1: Rules Are for Suckers
I can’t take credit for this idea, it’s something that Ruth Soukup talks about extensively in her recent book, Do It Scared. I’ve written a post about my top 5 takeaways from the book, but an additional takeaway is her chapter entitled, “Rules Are for Suckers.”
For me, being a person who tends to care what others think (more about that in my blog post), this is kind of a shocking idea!! To be clear, she is not saying we should be lawless criminals, she’s just saying that you have to make things work for you and throw out all the “shoulds” that keep you from doing that.
I once attended a retreat where one of the leaders met with me and I was going on and on about how I “should do” this and “should do” that, and he said, “Look. Should is sh*t. There’s no other way to say it. Stop doing what you should and do what you need. What you know is right. In here.” That last bit was said pointing at his heart. Great advice that I had forgotten all about until I read Ruth’s book last fall.
For more takeaways from Ruth’s book, see the blog post here:
5 Takeaways from Do It Scared by Ruth Soukup
Thing 2: Paying for Chores
In the spirit of breaking the rules, I have gone against every parenting book and piece of advice I have ever read and have started paying for chores. I have always thought that my kids should do chores because they live here and that’s part of contributing to the household community. Paying for them always felt like we’d be turning them into mercenaries. But here’s the thing. My husband and I both work full time and neither of us wants to do chores either. So not only do we not model good caretaking, the chores just don’t get done. Everything is always a mess, we never have clean underwear, and we’re lucky if there’s TP in the house. It’s not a workable situation, and we ALL need incentive.
So now we have a pay system and EVERYONE (including my husband and myself) gets paid for the chores we do. I pay less than half what I’d pay a professional, but enough so that it feels worth it to do the work. But any given chore can only be claimed once a week, so now there’s also an economy around the chores, since some chores are more palatable to some people.
Bottom line: the chores are getting done, and I have to admit, it’s nice to pocket a few bucks here and there to fold and put away the laundry.
Thing 3: Top 5 Instagram Posts of 2019
I thought it would be fun to go through and look at what posts and Instagram posts were the most popular last year. My hope is that it will help you find the best content that you might be able to use!!
First up are the five Instagram posts of 2019, you can find that here:
Top 5 Favorite Instagram Posts This Year
That’s it!
This week it’s all about celebrating wins and making things work for YOU, even if that system looks a little weird to other people. How do you do chores?
Comment below and let me know, or come find me on Facebook or Instagram!
Much love,
P.S. Oh yes, and for the curious, the memoir I read was Maybe You Should Talk to Someone by Lori Gottlieb. Sounds like a self-help book but it’s a can’t-put-it-down memoir by a therapist, HER therapist, her clients and the breakup that turned her life upside down.
